The season of Epiphanytide, those two to six weeks that hinge on the date of Easter have always been about light and dark, the light of truth and the dark of lies. For us in Northern California it is a winter season, which seems appropriate, given the dark stormy skies broken at times by a piercing sun, low, close to the horizon. The winter sun, traveling in a lower arc over fewer hours in the day seems clearer and more brilliant than it does in other seasons, nearly blinding at times.
And so it is an appropriate time to hear Gospel lessons that heal our blindness, show us who this Jesus of Nazareth was and is, who he claimed to be. The first Sunday is the account of Jesus in the temple, the second Sunday is the baptism of Jesus, the third Sunday is the miracle of the water turned to wine (first miracle), the fourth Sunday is two miraculous healings (leprosy and palsy), 
the fifth Sunday is the parable of the harvesting the wheat and the burning of the tares (a dire warning), and the sixth Sunday is the parable of the laborers in the field (the last shall be first and the first shall be last). Today was the account of Jesus baptized by John, and the Holy Spirit descending upon him like a dove, and a voice from Heaven saying, “Thou art my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”
As I work through the first draft of my novel-in-progress, I rely on an hour on a Sunday to be healed by Christ once again. So we confess our failings, our sins of the week, we repent, and we receive forgiveness from God the Father through his Son and his Church. Much is said today about forgiveness and not much about confession and repentance. And yet we are told they go together, depend upon one another. Forgiveness cannot happen without repentance, turning away in a new direction, changing. To be healed of blindness one must change and no longer live in darkness but in light. We want to be the wheat and not tares when Christ comes again, or when we find ourselves at the end of life on Earth. Christ gathers the wheat and burns the tares. Seems pretty clear.
Change is challenging. Change is a rebirth of our souls again and again, until we are whole, holy. Today we are weak creatures. Tomorrow, will we be weaker or stronger? Will our hearts burn with love or hate? What path are we following? Toward the light or the dark? How do we know?
We go to church and we listen, mark, and inwardly digest the words of the preacher, the words of Scripture, and the words of life as the Word becomes present again in the Host and the wine.
Mystery and miracle! Such gifts are found in a humble manger where the Son of God is born to us today, yesterday, and tomorrow. We feed on these great gifts of the Church and, like the wheat in the field, we grow toward the light. The weeds will try and grow too, but without direction and purpose, and one day they will be thrown into the fire.
In my novels, I try to capture these mysteries and miracles of life, all around us, in us, for us. We are creatures of good and evil. Do we want to be creatures of only good? Do we want to be healed? Do we want to see truth, know truth? If so, we need feeding so that we will confess, repent, and be forgiven.
I thought about these things in our little chapel in Berkeley this morning as the sun shafted in upon the crucifix and the altar, and the organ boomed gloriously. I thought how simple it really was, this business of seeing, and yet how difficult it was for many folks to be simple as a child, as a baby in a manger under a bright star of the heavens. How simple to say, I’m sorry, Lord. For an hour we sang together. We spoke the words of the liturgy as one body and were fed by Scripture, sermon, and Eucharist. But we also prayed to God the Father that we acknowledged and bewailed our manifold sins… committed by thought, word, and deed. We repented earnestly and were heartily sorry! No longer did we want to remember them, for they were an intolerable burden… We cried for mercy to the Father for the Son’s sake, to be forgiven. We wanted to live in newness of life to the Father’s honor and glory.
At some point we recited the Ten Commandments and the wonderful response to each one, Lord, have mercy upon us, and incline our hearts to keep this law, and lastly, write all these thy laws in our hearts, we beseech thee. Dear Lord, help is needed, please. Dear Father, incline our hearts! Write the laws on our hearts! Help is needed from Almighty God, our Heavenly Father.
And we sang hymns as the organ trilled, making a joyful noise that rose over the altar to the crucifix and beyond through the clerestory windows, sanctifying the town of Berkeley.
Like Jesus rising from the waters of baptism, we rise too, for we have been baptized into Christ and his bride, the Church, so that one day we will hear the words from our Father in Heaven, “Thou art my beloved child, in whom I am well pleased.”
Christine Sunderland
Christine Sunderland 